Ugh, I just got another rejection letter. I've had so many I've lost count. I mean what are these agents looking for? According to Writer's Digest which I'm not sure I should be reading at this fragile time says, 99 percent of the time an agent stops reading a partial submission before page 10. I guess they know immediately or not if they are going to love your story. The article goes on to say how frustrating it is for writers that most industry professional only glance at a project that in my case took me a over an entire year to write and rewrite. I mean on the 8th line, I let the reader know there's tension, I LET THEM KNOW SOMETHING BAD HAPPENED. HELLO?!
They go on to acknowledge that in a system like the theirs, hundreds of thousands of excellent books just don't make it to representation, and thus millions of dollars are likely to be left on the table.
"It's okay. It's gonna be okay. Breathe, just breathe through this madness and most importantly, don't give up. You have a set time for success if you don't give up." That's what I tell myself, always.
It's not just the rejections and hundreds of hours perfecting my craft for free, it's the pressure. The pressure to stay afloat. The pressure to keep knocking on doors. The pressure of the lack of opportunities. The pressure of the story I so deeply want to tell and wonder if anyone will ever listen. Bueller?
The skies are grey today and so is my heart. I long for warmth and sunshine and a big lucrative book deal where I will see my book in the window of a Paris bookshop. Really? Is that too much to ask for?
Tuning out for today. Got to get back to work for my tomorrow. xo
P.S- I'll keep you posted dreamers.